Showing posts with label relocating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relocating. Show all posts

Sunday, May 27, 2007

The other side of the coin

I finally found someone who doesn't like Raleigh. My coworker Jen, a 24-year-old Austin, TX native, is not happy here. But her set of criteria is quite different than mine. She's the kind of girl who likes to go to bars and clubs to drink and listen to live music. Those activities are at the rock bottom of my list of fun things to do. She says that in Austin, the downtown area is highly concentrated with over a hundred bars and clubs in just a few blocks. They always have live music, and it's super easy to just walk from one place to the next to keep the party going, so to speak. Whereas here in Raleigh, from what I've been told, while the downtown area has many bars, most don't feature live music, and they are not all clumped together for convenience. So, I guess if that's your scene, Raleigh is not the place for you.

Luckily for me, that is most definitely not my scene, and I am very happy here. I'm loving my house more each day. Except for the pesky lawn. I would be totally fine with the mowing and such if only it would grow green! But it's all brown and ugly (in the front yard, which I never sit in by my neighbors have to look at). Many yards in my neighborhood are the same, so I don't feel quite so bad, but many are lush, and I am so envious. I really need a gardener to get everything up to speed so I can just take over a well-oiled machine. But when it comes to gardening, I'm clueless, as my father can attest. I have some lovely native plants in the backyard (which pessimists call weeds) that I think are perfect.


They are green and lush, and require no watering on my part to grow. But I've been told to yank them up or I will regret it in the long run. I used a string trimmer for the first time yesterday. It really made such a difference around the edges of my lawn, up against the house and along the brick trim where you can't reach with a lawnmower. Slowly but surely I'm learning, but I hope everything doesn't die before I get the hang of it!

I do have some sources of pride in my backyard; namely, the magnolia tree and the daylilies. Granted, I had to do nothing to make these bloom, but I'm still proud to see them in my own backyard.


Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Comment roundup

Although I get an email every time someone comments on my blog, sometimes it's hard to tell where that comment was posted if it wasn't in response to the most recent post. So instead of digging through old posts and responding in the comments there, I'll just respond here.

Anonymous said,
I am a one of those people that read your blog and love the insight you have on living in North Carolina. I live in socal and plan on moving to nc next year.
Thanks for letting me know! I set out writing this blog for people just like you, so I'm glad it's reaching its intended audience!

And my "fan," the one who recognized me at Qdoba, said,
It's Kim from MA. It was so much fun meeting you! North Carolina is definitely a friendlier place. I don't think I would have surprised someone like that back home.
I hear you, Kim! If I'd been in L.A., I probably would have not walked up to some strangers who were calling my name. I would have run the other way! But it really was such a delightful surprise to meet a blog reader in that way. It's one of those stories you never forget.

Like the time my boyfriend discovered that our house keys matched. He lived in Lancaster; I was living in Canyon Country (these are suburbs of L.A. about 45 minutes apart). A spare house key of mine was sitting on my mantel. He happened to see it and said it looked just like his. Now, I think all keys look alike (well, you know what I mean) but somehow he recognized the actual shape of the grooves and when we held up mine next to his, sure enough, they were the same! We immediately went to the front door, and he used his house key to unlock my door. That was a Twilight Zone moment if there ever was one! I understand the odds are not all that phenomenal, because when you're talking about common doorknobs, there are only so many groove combinations. BUT, this was still mind boggling to me, that of all the keys to match, it would be mine and his. Of course I wanted to see this as some sort of sign that we were meant to be together--ha!--we're not--but it is still "one of those stories."

I'm becoming somewhat of a story enthusiast. I got back from a trip to South Carolina this afternoon, and one thing I've found that makes the driving go by more quickly is listening to podcasts. My favorites are from NPR, especially "Driveway Moment," "Story of the Day," and "Morning Stories." There is something so precious about a well-told story. If you have iTunes (and if you don't, go download it now!), you should check them out. They're free and usually pretty short, and leave you feeling just a tad bit enriched.

I'll leave you with a lovely cloud formation captured yesterday on my way to South Carolina.

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Replies to comments

I've gotten a couple comments recently and wanted to respond, but I doubt my reply would ever be seen if I buried it in the comments. So here y'all go:
The area looks lovely/ What anout that humidity tho?? Ugh... I had contacted you about moving from CA to NC before. Well hubby got job in Charlotte, possibly Cary now for the move. My question is do you regret the move since you have been going through a summer out there? After your recent trip to LA would you rather go back home?? Just wondering if we're doing the right thing???
First of all, Charlotte is nowhere near Cary, but maybe your husband will be working from home? Secondly, I do not regret moving--and I honestly feel that this is my home now. However, I will not sugar-coat it: the humidity is downright awful. You do not want to stay outside for any length of time. The temp does cool off at night, but the humidity creeps up, so it's still not comfortable. You will need to run your A/C 24/7 from the end of June till the end of August. (Although I will say that today we are enjoying a spectacular reprieve from typical summer weather--it's noon and only 70 degrees outside! Granted, it is raining, but last week it was raining and 90, so I'm not complaining!) I doubt I will ever get used to the humidity. But one mitigating factor is it rarely goes above 100 degrees here, even with the heat index. After experiencing 113 in So Cal recently, I was happy to return to low 90's, even if it was wetter.
I have lived in the SW for almost all of my life and can't stand the lack of rain, the lack of "the early American outlook and history", the abundance of cactus, the ugly yards, the 122 degree summers (yes, I know it's dry heat but at 122 it really doesn't matter-it's too hot to breathe!) I'm considering picking up, leaving my friends of 30 yrs., my 23 yr. old son, and piling all my belongings into a "pod", selling a house that has tripled in price since I bought it and "mushing " on down to Raleigh/Cary/Garner NC---------a place I have never been to and in which I do not know a single soul! But my heart is so "Eastern" with the rich history and gorgeous decks and backyards for my dogs, with the plethora of cultural activities and, so far, the friendliness of the Southerners I have met so far, I can't stay away from dreaming that I can one day actually live there. Am I nuts?????? Most of my friends think I am but I have a few that say "follow your dream" and your friends will all come to see you when it's 122 degrees again! Any advice for an intrinsic Easterner that has somehow been dropped all her life in the SW?
It sounds to me like you already know what you want. And I say, go for it! What you describe is basically what I did--packed up in a POD, left all my friends behind, and moved someplace I had only seen once, for a day. I can't guarantee you will have no regrets, because I was fortunate enough to have my family move with me, but you are definitely not nuts to want to leave the southwest for a greener, friendlier area. I will caution you that some of the yards around here are not as beautiful as you may imagine. Yes, they have lawns, but rarely do they have sprinkler systems, so when there is a drought (which are frequently accompanied by water restrictions) the lawns suffer. But so much of NC is still in its natural state (densely wooded), so in my opinion that makes up for it. The landscape is bleak in the winter when most of that forest is bare, but it is glorious in spring, summer, and fall.

You mention Raleigh, Cary, and Garner. They are very different. I will spare you the dissertation-length comparison and boil it down to a nutshell: Cary is snobby (think Stepford), Garner is redneck, and Raleigh is, well, there are city parts and country parts and suburb parts, so you have to be careful where you pick, if you're picky. (Of course, all of that is a major generalization and some might think it's an unfair description, but it's my impression.) I'm in Apex, and I feel like Goldilocks, because it's just right for me.

I would suggest that you fly out for a few days and see if you like it. If you're like me, you will be very pleased with what you find, and you will be motivated to make the move happen. It can be scary, no doubt, but I am glad I took the risk because I am very happy here.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Observation

There is a small yet in some ways significant difference between North Carolina and California that I have heretofore neglected to discuss. It’s the kind of thing that, when confronted with it, I think to myself, “I should totally blog about this,” but then when it comes time to sit down at the keyboard, I have long forgotten about it. I am speaking about none other than toilet seat covers. Or rather, the lack of them here in the Tar Heel State. Every public bathroom in California has them, but here, not so much. I’ve probably seen them once. I’d always taken them for granted. I figured it was one of those modern-day givens, something that came into common use years ago and is here to stay. But apparently it’s not as common as I assumed. It’s peculiar how something so basic can be ubiquitous in one state and completely absent in another. It makes me wonder: are people in California that much more concerned about germs and cleanliness? At what point does the tide turn and merchants/office building managers feel compelled to provide this courtesy? I guess I have to tally this oddity in the “culture shock” column, although like everything else, it’s not been so much a shock as an “all righty then.”

Monday, March 27, 2006

Index of My North Carolina Relocation Experience

[index updated 6/15/06]

To my fellow and potential relocators: I hope this bit of organization makes it easier to find what you might be looking for. Choose a category:

Preparing to move

And so it begins
Sold!
Isn't it ironic?
Techno update
Packing
Down to the wire
I have way too much stuff!
POD people
Goodbyes
Purging via Craigslist
My stuff is here!


Cross-country travel

On the road!
Flagstaff to Albuquerque
Photos
Albuquerque to Amarillo
Amarillo to Oklahoma City
Catching up to the present


Finding an apartment or house

Why I'm moving to NC
Apartment and house hunting
A new apartment and a new house!
Traffic and suburbs


Finding a job

Job hunt
Various and sundry
Job search continues
When it rains, it pours
I got an interview!
Eh
Scarves and jobs
Sigh
Exciting!
Quick update
I got a job!!
First day at work
One in four


Making friends

Making friends
Goings on
Phooey on resolutions
Finally!
Dolls and movies
When it rains it pours


Driving and traffic

City of Brotherly Love
Deer v. Auto
Finally!
DMV and library
Traffic and suburbs
Getting the heck out of Dodge
I'm official!
100k
Not the trees!
Life goes on


Weather

My first scarf
Getting in the Christmas spirit
Job hunt

Various and sundry
Goings on the past few days
Glories of 8 am and rental cars
Minutiae
Getting the heck out of Dodge
100th post
Holy Thunderstorms, Batman!
Some like it hot
California, here I come
Good ol' weekend recap
Severe weather
Lightning squared
Where's the ark?

Culture shock?

More deer but innocuous this time
Triangle: Where North and South (and West) Collide
Getting the heck out of Dodge
There must be something in the water
One in four
100k
Observation

Shopping

A Trader ventures Southeast!
The latest on Trader Joe's
Raleigh Farmers' Market

Things to do/Places to eat

Goin' to the State Fair
My stuff is here!
Hiking in the Hemlock Bluffs
City of Brotherly Love

Big Three-oh
Goings on
Weekend adventures
Weekend update
DMV and library
Umstead Park hike

Quick update
100k
Big kitties
Long time no post
Apple Chill and flowers
California, here I come
Busy Saturday

Monday, February 27, 2006

I'm official!

Today I officially became a North Carolina resident! I got my driver's license, registered to vote, and got my license plate. I had been putting this off for months; you're supposed to do it within 60 days but I became excellent at hemming and hawing. The DMV has never been my favorite place, for more than the average person's complaints about long wait times. Suffice it to say, I didn't do so well on my first (or second!) behind-the-wheel exams back when I was 16. It's a memory that haunts me to this day; I was an excellent student, accustomed to things coming easy to me, and then to fail this twice, it was like a slap in the face. I've had anxiety about the DMV ever since.

I knew it was not likely that I would have to take a behind-the-wheel exam here in NC. According to the DMV, the three things required of new residents licensed in another state are 1) a knowledge test, 2) a vision test, and 3) a traffic sign test. The behind-the-wheel exam is "at the discretion of the tester," and no one I knew who'd relocated had ever had to take it. But I also was afraid I'd screw up the knowledge test. I knew this was an irrational fear. Thousands of people who haven't even graduated high school take this exam and pass it every year; I'm college educated and have always been a good tester.

Well, thankfully, all my fears were for naught. The knowledge test was super easy. It was administered on a touch-screen computer and each question only had three choices. So right there, you've got a 33% chance of guessing the right one. As long as you read the handbook, you'd have to be retarded not to know most of the answers. For example: "When driving in snow, it is best to A) hit the brakes a lot, b) drive slowly, c) speed up." Come on, people! One made me laugh. "Studies have shown that a large number of accidents are caused by which of the following: A) Middle aged drivers, B) Women drivers, C) Slow drivers." I wonder how many people put B.

One awesome thing about taking the exam electronically is that you get immediate feedback as to whether you got each question right. You have to get 20 out of 25 questions right to pass. Once you hit 20 correct, though, the test ends...I only answered 21 questions. I got one wrong: "When approaching a right turn, the best thing to do is: A) Honk your horn (or some such ridiculous answer), B) Move slightly to the left in your lane to avoid hitting the curb when turning, C) slow down and stay to the right." I chose B, because that is what I do. But the answer was C. Oh well. No matter.

First thing when you walk in the office, you have to pick a line. It wasn't terribly crowded when I arrived, but while I stood there the line grew to almost out the door. I was later informed that Mondays and Fridays are their busiest days. There were only three windows open, and each one was for different types of transactions. When I got to the window, I sat down and handed over my documents. Social Security card, CA driver's license, proof of insurance, and proof of residency (water bill). The guy spent five minutes typing in all my info. He asked if I wanted to register to vote. I went ahead and did it, hoping I wouldn't get called for jury duty any time soon. He had me look into this little binocular-type thing for the vision test, which apparently I passed (I was nervous about that too, since I've been squinting a lot lately). I also had to identify all the types of traffic signs. They were all really easy, because I had reviewed them in the handbook. Then he had me go take the test. When I was done, I waited for a different window to be open. One neat thing in this state is you get to pick the background of your license. You have four choices: silhouette of North Carolina, a lighthouse, the Great Seal of North Carolina, or the ubiquitous airplane. Shouldn't be a monumental decision, but I did have to think about it for a while (luckily I overheard another customer being presented the options ahead of time). I ultimately chose the lighthouse. I wrote out a check for a whopping $16 and was told my license would expire in 2010. Sounds like the distant future!! Surely we'll have flying vehicles by then... Next I walked over to the photo lady, and waited (yet again) to be called. I got my picture taken (turned out pretty good) and then a few minutes later my card was printed. The whole process took about an hour.

Then I drove over to the license plate office a few miles away. Why this can't all be done in the same place is beyond me. The line at the second office seemed quite long but it moved pretty quickly. I forked over my newly acquired license, and the title to my car. I'd gone online ahead of time and printed and filled out the necessary form, so she just entered my info from that. I decided to splurge on a personalized plate: M CUBED. (My initials are MMM.) It's only an extra $30 per year and I've never had one before. I got a temporary plate for now (although it is just like a permanent one) and the other one should arrive in the mail in about 3 weeks. I had to pay $5 in cash for a notary fee, and the rest I paid via check. I now have 10 days to get my car inspected, which should be a simple process. They check your headlights, windshield wipers, etc. Just another way for the state to collect a fee, I suppose.

The rest of my day was equally busy. Stopped at the library to provide proof of residency since I had it now. Went to Target for six things, two of which they didn't have (4" x 6" unruled index cards and flavored bubbly water). Browsed in the dollar section, which always has fun little stuff. Got these adorable little candle holders:


They are solid metal and I could totally see them at Pier 1 for $9.99 each. Also got a bunch of magnets. Have I shared my magnet addiction with you? Used to be just a few magnets from places I traveled. But now I've got magnets of all shapes and sizes. They cover my fridge. Finding a bunch of neat-o ones for a buck at Target does not help the situation...

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Getting the heck out of Dodge

From a reader in California:
I am originally from there, moved out here in 1985 with my family and now am considering moving my own family back there. We live in the high desert out here and HATE IT. Traffic is horrible, people are so rude and a larger home for a stay-at-home mom with 3 kids is out of the question out here right now. Has it been a difficult adjustment for any of your family members? The humidity, the bugs, the accents :)? I truly miss the GREEN Country. I think we're afraid of culture shock.
It sounds to me like a move to NC is just what the doctor ordered for y'all. The ills you face out there are all but distant memories out here. People here are miles away from rude. Housing here is infinitely more affordable. And it is nothing if not green, green, green everywhere. Well, except during the winter! As I've said before, traffic exists but is less horrible than So Cal. You say the high desert; do you mean the Antelope Valley/Lancaster/Palmdale area? If so, I can agree that the rush-hour traffic there is quite challenging--and rush "hour" lasts for like three hours in the morning and three hours in the evening!

You really should not fear culture shock. I have not experienced any at all. If anything, it's been a culture "pleasant surprise." LOL! Humidity in the summer is definitely an issue, but that's what A/C is for. And the beauty of the Triangle is you are only 2-3 hours away from the mountains or the ocean for a cooler weekend escape.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

The Triangle: Where North and South (and West) Collide

More questions from a reader (thanks for commenting, Kathy!):
Can you tell more about the culture in RTP? I've heard it attracts people from all over so it's quite diverse. I know I've heard about Californians relocating there and now New Yorkers who move to Florida but then realize it's not for them so they head half-way back to NC and are called halfbacks. I thought that was interesting. So is it southern, northern or a mix of everybody?
Funny--I hadn't heard the "halfback" theory, but one of my friends would fit into that category. He followed that exact pattern...NY to FL to NC. I'm not sure why he picked NC though.

I would say it is a mix of everybody here. I've commented before on how everyone here is from someplace else, and those other places tend to be scattered. I've met people from Atlanta, Washington D.C, Boston, New York City, Michigan, Texas, California, Illinois, Oregon...and more that I cannot think of right now. One joke I've heard is that Cary stands for "Concentrated Area of Relocated Yankees." I have met a few North Carolina natives, but they are by far the minority here. To me, the area does not scream Southern (although I haven't lived in the true South so my frame of reference is restricted). Here are a few off-the-cuff observations that will tell you this is the South:
  • Wendy's offers the "Carolina Classic": a burger topped with chili and coleslaw.
  • Nearly every restaurant, be it sit-down or fast food, offers sweet tea.
  • In the summer or fall, you will likely be invited to a "pork pull" or "fish fry"
  • You will encounter a southern drawl every now and then but it's more lilting than anything. Local newscasters and DJ's do not have accents.
  • People here (not just men!) are fanatical about college sports, mainly basketball; this website ranks the Duke Blue Devils and UNC-Chapel Hill Tar Heels as the number one rivalry around.
  • The pace of life is only slightly slower than what I'm used to from California.
  • People complain about the drivers here being particularly horrendous (one theory is that it's because there are so many former New Yorkers who never had licenses before) but I have not noticed it as being any worse than any other place I've driven. People do speed on the freeways but not like L.A.
  • You get the overall impression that church is slightly more prominent in people's lives here, but then again, hardly any of the people I've become friends with go on a regular basis.
I have noticed that when I visit my brother in Western North Carolina, which is rural and up in the mountains, the Southern characteristics become much more prominent. Everyone has a thicker accent, things are much slower, people are less open-minded/progressive. I think my hometown and my new town share more similarities than differences, due to the fact that they are both suburbs. That seems to me to be the overriding characteristic. I suspect that if you chose to live in Raleigh or Durham proper, you would find they are first and foremost cities, and only secondarily Southern cities.

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Traffic and suburbs

I got some questions from a reader and instead of hiding my reply in the comments section, I thought I'd post it here where it's easier to find.
Melissa,

I found your blog through a travel forum, I think city-data.com or something. I'm also thinking of moving from Orange County to NC.
I've really enjoyed reading about your experiences. One reason I want to leave So Cal is the horrendous traffic. Do you find a lot of traffic to the bigger cities?
Also, if you have any info on housing prices in the suburbs, that would be great. I need to work in a larger city but I don't really want to live there. But I don't want to live out in the boonies either. Of course this is all relative coming from someone who drives to and works in Los Angeles!
Anyway, hope to hear from you. I'll keep reading and enjoy NC vicariously for now!
Cheryl
Hi Cheryl! Thanks for leaving a comment! Yes, So Cal traffic is really awful. Traffic here in the Triangle is definitely less severe, but it does exist. Capital Blvd. in northeast Raleigh is notoriously bad--it's a very busy street with signals at every block. And if you work in Research Triangle Park (RTP), getting in and out is pretty nightmarish. Of course, I'm not currently working, so I have not really experienced the daily grind of a rush hour.

But on the occasions when I've found myself trying to get somewhere around that time, I have noticed there IS quite a bit of traffic. For instance, I drove to Durham (big city) from my home in Apex (little suburb) for an interview. I left at 8:30 and arrived at 9:15, a 29-mile drive which according to Google should take 34 minutes. There were pockets of congestion but it wasn't that bad. Another day, I drove from Apex to Cary (also a suburb), a six-mile drive supposed to take nine minutes--it took about 25, when I left at 7:30 am. But I had to travel most of the time on a road with construction. There is a TON of construction going on all around right now--they're mostly trying to widen main arteries, which, until completion, makes those main arteries even more clogged. That's the price you pay for growth, though.

One notable difference out here is that the rush hour is very defined. I would say the morning traffic peaks around 7:30 - 8:30, and the evenings are worst from 5:30-6:30. Other than those times, the streets and freeways are light to average. And unlike Los Angeles, if you're driving around after 11 pm, you are likely to be alone (at least in the Cary/Apex area--I cannot speak for Raleigh and Durham proper). It is kind of eerie to see the freeway and streets completely empty and dark.

Speaking of which, darkness has been somewhat of an issue for me; streetlights are virtually nonexistent here. Cary does the best job of lighting their streets, but everywhere the freeways are pitch black. When there are lots of other cars, the combined brightness of headlights is enough. But when you're solo, it's hard to see. Another issue is a lack of street signs. Many are totally unlabeled, or labeled only with teeny tiny signs on one corner of a giant intersection. The first few weeks of trying to find your way around can be frustrating, but having a map handy helps. The best one I found was in a tourist booklet at my hotel. An online version of it is here. And if you have one of those fancy computerized navigation devices in your car, you're golden.

All of that said, not for one minute have I wished I could go back to So Cal traffic conditions.

As for housing prices in the suburbs, you might want to search current listings here. It's one of the better sites because it does not require registration and it lets you specify lots of parameters in addition to price and location, such as age, number of bedrooms, etc. (Note: Late spring into summer will offer a better selection; right now few people are on the move because they want to keep their kids in school.) If you're looking to live in a suburb and commute to the city, there are lots of options--Cary, Apex, Morrisville, Holly Springs, Fuquay-Varina, Garner, Wake Forest, Rolesville, and even Knightdale and Pittsboro. But it's hard to recommend any because it depends on which city you work in. The "Triangle" is really more like a blob, because of sprawl. For instance, Wake Forest is a lovely area, but if you work in Chapel Hill, your commute would be pretty icky (over 40 miles), and Pittsboro might be a better choice. It feels like "the boonies," but it's only about 30 minutes from Chapel Hill.

One thing you should keep in mind is that out here, city limits are pretty far-reaching. For example, there are houses with Raleigh addresses that feel more like the country. If you decide to explore the area further, get in touch with a real estate agent; they will be able to direct you to the neighborhoods that best match your needs. Or, do like I did. Rent an apartment and get a feel for the area yourself before deciding where to buy. You can check out ApartmentRatings.com to help pick a good complex.

I hope this helps! Please feel free to ask any more questions as they pop into your head.

Monday, December 05, 2005

Making Friends

Making friends as an adult is difficult. When you're young, you easily befriend the neighbors' children. When you're in school, you see the same kids every day, so it's easy to form friendships. In college, you live with your friends. As an adult, the only people you see everyday are your co-workers, who may or may not be compatible with you on a personal level. Why is it that we could almost always find someone in one of our classes to be our best friend, but at work, it's virtually unheard of? I think adults are more closed off to meeting new people. Sure, they will be polite, even kind, and chat at the water cooler. But when it comes to the real stuff of friendship, or even just taking a casual friendship outside the office, adults would rather stick with their current group, thank you very much. Which poses problems when you move to a new area.

Part of what made the Triangle appealing as a place to relocate was its reputation for being an area where everybody is from somewhere else. This makes you feel less like an outsider, and theoretically should facilitate making friends. Well, it's true, everyone here IS from someplace else, and everyone IS quite friendly. Why, at the mall on Saturday, an older lady engaged me in a conversation about modern fashion trends in denim, complete with supporting info she'd picked up from Oprah. And the lady at the calendar store went on and on about her golden retriever. People here can gab, let me tell you. And that's great, I'm all for gabbing. But then you go on your merry way, back to your empty apartment with only a TV and computer to keep you company. And a cat, if you're lucky! :)

So where can one turn in her moment of need? Craigslist, of course! I posted under “Activity Partners,” looking for someone with whom I could go to the movies, try a new restaurant, or go shopping. (Other posters seek jogging buddies, poker partners, etc.) Many people responded, but nothing really got off the ground right away. So I posted again, in the same category, but this time looking for partners for knitting, bridge, or bunco. This one got lots of responses too, and I actually have met some nice people. Even after the first wave, both posts continued to generate responses, because the Activity Partner boards for Raleigh are pretty sparse, so my posts were still close to the top.

Now, I'm not sure how my newfound friends would feel about appearing in my blog, so I'll use pseudonyms, and I won't write much about their backgrounds although they are so varied and unique! I find the diverse mix to be one of the most fascinating aspects of meeting people via CL. First there was “Alan,” from India by way of San Francisco. We went to see Walk the Line. (On the way home was when I hit the deer.) But the movie was really good, and the company was delightful. Of course, sitting in a dark theater didn't provide much time for chatting, but we got in some good talk time before and after. We met again last week to have dinner at an Indian restaurant, and we had a chance to get to know each other even more. We have a stunning amount in common, and he is accomplished in such a vast number of arenas, my jaw never left the floor. Yet he is very down to earth and normal.

Next was “Lucy”, who's originally from DC. We met for coffee. What piqued her interest in my posting was my reference to the New York Times (they'd recently run an article on bridge). She was pleasant as can be, and had a lot of advice to offer in regards to finding a job in the nonprofit sector here. We are going to get together next week and knit.

Then there's “Lawrence.” He runs a spades group on Yahoo, as well as a board games group. He invited me to join and there was a big get-together at his fiancée “Candy's” apartment on Friday. Beforehand, the three of us went out for Mexican food (I found a wire in my chicken--very puzzling--upon retrospect, I think it must have been from one of those twist-tie thingies they use to bundle vegetables). Later at the apartment five others joined us and we played Apples to Apples, Taboo, and Pictionary. Candy had baked a cake (she's opening a cake business soon) which was delicious and we all had a fabulous time. Among the players was “Lisa,” who wants to learn to knit, so hopefully we'll get together soon for that.

Saturday I met with “Michelle,” from Boston. We are probably the most similar in family background and upbringing, although she's in the science field and I, well, am not. We went shopping at the mall. I acquired several things for the kids, so at least their Xmas shopping is done. I found out from Michelle that you can't get your NC license or plates until you've lived here three months. Whew! Here I thought I was a major slacker having waited this long. Apparently you have to show them three utility bills that prove your middle name. Go figure. Anyway, Michelle and I are going to meet again to see Jim Carrey's Fun With Dick and Jane when it comes out.

I'm also slated to meet with “Linda,” originally from Atlanta. (See, no one IS from here!) We were going to go to the Apex Christmas Parade this past weekend, but decided against it because it most likely would have been a logistical nightmare to find parking and meet up. So we're going on a Christmas train ride this Saturday. Not sure what to expect, but it sounds relaxing.

I hope at least a couple of these new friendships “take,” and they aren't just short-lived distractions. It's hard, because even when people ARE open to making new friends, sometimes there just isn't enough in common for the relationship to endure. I think kids have it easier because their requirements for friendship are so lax, probably due to their lack of worldly experience, while adults have so much more criteria for what they want in a friend, and also they have so much baggage that gets in the way. (Come to think of it, all of this applies to romantic pursuits, as well!) But even if none of my fledgling friendships endure, it's been fun nevertheless to meet all these diverse people!

Sunday, October 30, 2005

My stuff is here!!!

Busy, busy, busy these past few days! My POD finally arrived on Thursday,


so I’ve been engrossed in unpacking and getting organized. Seeing all my stuff after a month of having practically nothing was like Christmas. I didn’t notice its absence much for the first few weeks, first staying at my parents' house and then in hotels. But living in an empty apartment for nearly two weeks without my stuff was frustrating. I should not complain, because I had a roof over my head, the heat worked, and the basic necessities were covered in terms of a bathroom and a minimalist kitchen. But it’s remarkable all the things you find yourself needing, like a can opener (thankfully Campbell’s soups now have pop-top lids) and deposit slips (I’d run out). Anyway, all those concerns are over now, because I have my stuff!!

A quick side note: When I opened the POD, I couldn't help but laugh hysterically. It was practically half empty, compared to how crammed my parents' PODS were.


Alas, we could have fit SO much more in there...sad, considering how much stuff we ended up just giving away. But hindsight is 20/20, right? It's like the Titanic lifeboats (only much less tragic, of course)...the first few went out, seemingly full, until they realized how many more people they could actually carry.

I found some help unloading the POD on—where else?—Craigslist. Two guys from the Durham area came down and for 80 bucks did all the heavy lifting and carrying up the stairs. It took them less than two hours to finish! And it was worth every single penny, let me tell you. I did do a fair amount of unloading myself before they arrived, because the POD was delivered around noon and they couldn’t come till 5:00, and I was anxious to get started. But once they arrived, the most difficult task was directing them where to put the boxes as they were bringing them in. For instance, “This one says ‘Jewelry box, heater fan, Tupperware.’ Where do you want it?” he’d grunt under its weight (clearly it contained more than the label declared—bricks, perhaps?), waiting for me to make up my mind. “Uh, the bedroom, I guess?” A lot of things ended up in the bedroom, because it’s pretty big and has a ginormous closet, so if all else fails, shove it in there for the time being!

Once they finished, I got right to work opening boxes and putting things away. The kitchen is always the easiest place to start, because everything has a place and the biggest decision is which drawer to use for flatware and which cupboards to use for glasses and dishes. The rest of the house involves lots of decisions on where to put things—should the couch go here?, should the shelves go there?, and so on. I was motivated on Friday to get a lot done, because Saturday we had plans (more on this in a sec) and Saturday night my parents were coming over for dinner and a movie so the place had to be in some sort of presentable condition. I did a lot of pushing and pulling and sliding of things—very draining when you have a cold, which I do, of course. I think I’ve got all the furniture where I want it now, though. Still a fair amount of boxes to be gone through, but it’s manageable.

Saturday morning my apartment complex was having a yard sale, something I’m told they do twice yearly. It was bitter cold outside, in the high 30’s, and of course it was Saturday morning, so I slept in, probably missing all the greatest bargains. No matter, because I’m happy with my acquisition: a pink lava lamp, for a whopping three bucks! It works beautifully, and I enjoyed watching the mesmerizing gobs float around later that evening while we watched Bewitched (gotta love Netflix!).

After the yard sale, we drove out to Pittsboro, where my parents’ new house is, for the town’s annual street fair. It was a very lively event, packed with people, with tents stretching down the street and snaking around corners.


The weather was beautiful, with clear skies and a gently warming sun. We had fun checking everything out and meeting some of the locals. My mom bonded with a lady at the animal shelter booth who has Chihuahuas, and who recommended a good vet nearby. My dad liked the local sheriff as well as the candidate campaigning to replace him (who is also on the school board and who practically begged me to return to teaching as apparently Chatham county is in desperate need of teachers).

After the fair we went to check out the house again, to see what progress had been made.


The kitchen cabinets are in, and I think they are gorgeous.


The marble fireplace hearths are also in, and equally stunning. It’s coming along quite nicely. They have less than three weeks to finish—hopefully they come in on schedule!


Quickly, now, to backtrack for a second...I wanted to write about last Saturday, when my parents and I went up to Ennice (in the mountains of Alleghany county, about 3 hours away) to visit Matthew, Amy, and the kids. The leaves had started to change up there (everything down here is still pretty green) so the scenery was breathtaking.


Silly me, I dressed for warm weather (a la the state fair) and ended up freezing my patootie off. But it was still fun to see everyone and drive around. Prestin is officially experiencing the terrible two’s, learning to assert his own will...or at least testing the waters, seeing how far he can push his boundaries. He can still be very charming, though, especially when he learns a new word that makes you laugh. His current favorite toy is this gold string of Mardi Gras beads, which I promptly named his "bling bling." Of course I howled with laughter when he finally picked up on this term, which encouraged him to use it even more.


Ah, the joys of children. Meanwhile Layne's temperament is sweet as can be. And of course Cassidy is ever-adorable in the way most six-month-old babies are.


The coming week will start out uneventful—more unpacking—but on Thursday I drive to Philadelphia to visit Marcy, an old friend from high school (who is now a professor at Penn!). I’m excited to see more of the East. I’ll be staying with her until the following Tuesday and hopefully I’ll have the time (and energy) to post about the trip before my other dear friend, Nicole, comes out to visit me for my birthday (the big three-oh!). Then maybe it’s time to start looking for a job...;-)

Monday, October 17, 2005

An apartment for me and a new house for my parents!

I’ve been in Cary for a week now. I was very comfortable in my hotel but I’m glad to have found an apartment. I went with Avalon Peaks, because it’s the largest and I like the location. Plus, my unit has some really nice views (which will be considerably less nice once fall is over and I’m looking at bare branches).

The view from my screened porch

My living room
The people in the leasing office were very accommodating and got my application approved in less than an hour. I could have moved in Friday, but I didn’t have a bed yet, so I opted for one more night in the hotel. After I signed the lease, I went bed shopping. The first place I stopped couldn’t deliver the next day, but the second store was able to. I picked a queen size bed, my first ever, and I went with something very, very firm, because my last mattress was too bouncy and got saggy too quickly. Of course my next stop had to be a linen store to get sheets. I want to go on Overstock.com to get 600 thread count sheets for like $60, but in the meantime I settled for 200 thread count for $25 from Linens ‘n Things.

I “moved in” on Saturday, which means I brought in my suitcase, computer, and cat. I made a quick Wal-Mart run to get things like toilet paper, laundry detergent, cat litter, hangers, a wastebasket, a shower curtain, etc. Some of these things I have, but they’re in the POD, and I can’t very well live without them for 10 days. I rushed home to be here for the 12-2 window for bed delivery. They came around 12:45. Then I went over to my parents’ hotel (they were not around…more on that later) where the fifth wheel is and I raided the cupboards for dishes, silverware, pots and pans, towels, pillows, and a TV. Came back to the apartment and started to get settled. Oddly, there is no medicine cabinet in the bathroom, which is such an inconvenience. I mean, there is so much storage in the apartment as a whole, but right where you need it, there’s nothing. Another odd thing, different from California, is I have to pay for water, sewer, and recycling. At this point, all the utilities are still being paid for by the complex. The power company is Progress Energy; I called them this morning, and power will switch over into my name tomorrow. The cable company will be out tomorrow between 8 am and 6 pm (yeah, no 4-hour window!) to connect the TV and high speed internet. For water, sewer, and recycling, I go through the town of Apex, but they require me to fill out an application online and I won’t have internet service until tomorrow so it will be a couple days before that transfers into my name.

Yesterday I made yet another run to Wal-Mart, to get some things I thought I could do without for ten days, but decided I couldn’t. First, a lamp for the bedroom. Lighting is provided in the kitchen, bathroom, and dining room/living room, but not in the bedroom. Can’t be in the dark for ten days. Also got a blanket for the bed. In the same shopping center as Wal-Mart is Harris Teeter, which is the upscale grocery store around here. I went in to get a few items. It is nice, but not terribly special. The prices are higher on convenience things like prepared foods from the deli, but normal on necessities like bread, milk, etc. Of course, I’m comparing the prices to CA; they could be high for the area. I’ll have to go to Lowes or Kroger to see if things are cheaper there. Our realtor told us to stay away from the Food Lion. I also made a stop at Best Buy to get a microwave, since there isn’t one provided in my unit. I ended up getting the same exact one I had when I lived in the condo in Playa del Rey.

So the reason my parents were not at the hotel when I stopped by was because they were out in Pittsboro, about 30 minutes west of here, finalizing details on their new house. It will be finished the week before Thanksgiving (hopefully). It’s 2600 square feet, and on three and a half acres of land. Here are some pictures of the construction so far...mouse over each photo for a description.

Walking up the long driveway to the new house
The front porch of the new house
View from the front porch of the new house
Entering the front door
View from the dining room's bay window
View from the kitchen
Fireplace in the master bedroom
The bonus room
The living room
The backyard...or at least part of it
The view from the driveway...all the cars are there for the big fish fry
It’s kind of “out there,” but you get there mostly via a decent sized freeway, not on small country roads. It’s kind of like the way Santa Clarita used to be 25 years ago, removed from the metropolitan area but close enough to commute or visit for shopping, etc. But it has a very rural feel. It will have a septic tank and well, which tells you it’s not really close to “civilization.”

So I signed a lease and my parents made an offer on a house on the same day, Friday 10/14. After all the searching, and all the possibilities, somehow we both ended up with the same street number. Talk about coincidence. Our addresses are both 1221. (Insert Twilight Zone music here.)

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Where were we?

These links used to be in the sidebar, but after a while they seemed irrelevant and outdated. I still want to keep them as a record, though, so I'm sticking them into a post dated October 13 (even though I'm writing this on December 5). Anyway, they show our progress as we made our way east across the United States.

Monday, September 05, 2005

And so it begins...

"If you actually learn to like being a beginner,
the whole world opens up to you."
— Barbara Sher

Welcome to my new blog. Until now I've been a silent observer of this somewhat new phenom, but finally I think I might have something worthwhile to contribute. I currently live in Los Angeles, California, a few miles from the airport. I'm moving to North Carolina in two weeks. I have only been there once before, for a week this past June. My brother lives there with his girlfriend, who recently gave birth to my niece, Cassidy Anne--thus the impetus for my visit. My mom came along, quite keen on the idea of being a grandmother.

Now, I'd made some rumblings about moving to NC for a little while before our trip, for a variety of reasons--mainly, wasn't happy at my job, was having difficulty getting over an old boyfriend, and wanted to have an adventure. But the main thing holding me back was I did not want to be 2,500 miles away from my parents. If I could convince them to come with me, though, nothing would stand in my way. My dad is always game for things like this, but my mom is more cautious. Then one day, apparently out of the blue, she started to warm up to the notion of living on "the other coast," North Carolina in particular. Not only is the cost of living much cheaper in NC compared to So Cal, but also it offers a plethora of new vacationing opportunities. We've lived here our whole lives and we've seen the West: California, Oregon, Washington, Idaho, Montana, Utah, Wyoming, Colorado, New Mexico, Arizona, Nevada. Love it, but seen it. How intriguing to have a new home base from which to explore the other half of the country! And, of course, we'd be closer to the new baby.

All right, I'm sold! So let's go already! Well, as I said, I'm moving in two weeks, but my parents can't yet. They own their house--the one my brother and I grew up in since 1979--and they have to sell it before they can move. You'd think this would be a simple and fast proposition in today's purportedly booming real estate market, but not so much. It's been two months now, and only one lowball offer. So, I'm moving out there ahead of them, trusting that eventually they will follow.

Why the rush, you ask? Well, I wasn't exactly a happy camper at my job. I will spare you the ponderous back story, and offer the nutshell: I was a junior high history and Spanish teacher for five years. I quit because the little brats drove me bonkers (although the other 90% were darling) and got a stop-gap job in the insurance industry. Then along came my "dream job," wherein I designed training materials and other such goodies for a nonprofit in the character education field. I don't want to burn any bridges, so I won't give details on why I wanted to leave. Suffice it to say: boss problems. But I will not hold back my praise of my cohorts in Publications: they are beyond awesome. Smart, hilarious, dedicated, capable, kind, supportive, the whole enchilada. Leaving them was hard; you can't get much better than these guys. Friday was my last day. Que triste!

So, having decided it was time to move on, I seized upon this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to pick up and move cross-country and start fresh. I am so excited to live in a completely different region and learn all about what makes it unique.

I am writing this blog to chronicle my odyssey: the preparation for moving, the trek across eight states (driving with my cat, Comet) and settling into a new apartment, job, friends, and community. I hope you find it interesting, and please feel free to comment on anything that moves you!